Time to Relax

“It’s now time to relax and move simply from your heart” said a wise old voice in my head.

Recently I have a felt sense that everything is ok.  It truly is.  And also it’s not.  It’s truly not.  I finally feel permission to rest here.  No part of me feels an urge to change things, to push and cajole people to change. To wake up!  To be more than they simply are, right now and that includes me first and foremost.

I realised with this new decade that I am here, ready, waiting, creating, ok, more than ok and that I want to simplify my life and hang out with people who are here with me, now.  I want to connect with people I bump into along the way of me, showing up for me, and being me, fully.

I want to move with the beat of my heart.  My physical, bloody, broken, pulsing heart.  Taking each day as a present and starting it with a grateful bow for this gift of life.

I love my essence and yet recently accepted I am not so keen on it’s vessel. I’ve neglected it’s messages, overridden it’s no and am all too aware of the consequences of that.  Thank goodness we are living longer as I still have a lot to learn, and even more so, another chance, every day, to unfurl another feather, petal and prickle of me and to feel it.  To truly feel it and release any unfelt, trapped emotion in every frond, silk and spike. 

It’s time to integrate this time on earth and distill and digest so far. To enjoy and not take things so seriously.  I want to create.  I need to create! 

So I am moving forward, and away, like the tides of the sea.  Meeting each tiny grain of sand, reflecting all the stars in the sky, trusting in my return to me.

These past few days have passed like blurs.  Streaks of light in a dark void.  My body aching with the recognition of love, received through my words, exchanged in a moment.

I am melancholy and mutating.  Sitting and basking in the pain and glory of being human, and the expressions I can bring forth because I have a body, a mind, and a heart full of love to guide me.